What is It Like to Be Led By You?

It’s a simple question, but it’s one that can be uncomfortable to wrestle with: “What is it like to be led by me?” Most of us go through our professional lives operating with good intentions. We want to inspire our teams, empower those around us, and provide the support necessary for everyone to succeed.

However, as an experienced leadership coach in Oklahoma City, we can tell you: intentions are not the same as impact.

The Gap Between Intent and Impact

We often judge ourselves by our intentions, but our teams experience us through our impact. We might intend to be supportive, but if our tone is consistently rushed, our team might perceive us as dismissive. We might intend to be collaborative, but if our reactions to bad news are defensive, we will unintentionally create an environment where people fear sharing concerns.

Our tone, our reactions, and our daily decisions shape the lived experience for those who work with us.

If you’re currently feeling as though your leadership isn’t producing the culture you desire, the first step isn’t to change your team. It’s to change how you observe your own influence.

Often, leaders fail to realize that their mood sets the emotional temperature of the entire office. If you arrive at meetings stressed and distracted, your team will mirror that energy, leading to decreased creativity and higher burnout rates. Understanding this dynamic is the first step toward becoming a more conscious, effective leader.

Audit Your Leadership Daily

To close the gap between your intent and your impact, you have to be willing to look at yourself with radical honesty. 

Here are four questions that you should be asking yourself on a regular basis.

1.) Am I making it easy for people to share ideas and concerns? 

If you’re only hearing “yes”, you might have built a culture of conformity instead of consensus.

2.) Do I encourage growth, especially when it means giving away the spotlight?

True leadership is not about being the smartest person in the room. It’s about building a room full of smart people! 

3.) How do my teams feel at the end of a busy week: energized, or depleted?

While hard work is part of business, constant depletion is a sign of poor leadership dynamics.

4.) Am I as open to feedback as I expect others to be?

If you demand transparency from your team, but hide behind your title, you have a credibility gap. And a credibility gap will not allow you to build the trust that’s needed to drive a high-performing culture.

Beyond these questions, consider keeping a leadership journal for at least one week. At the end of each day, write down one interaction where you felt you excelled and one where you felt you missed the mark. This simple practice will help you spot patterns in your behavior that you might overlook during a busy workday.

Another valuable idea that is incredibly simple, and maybe easier said than done, is to sit down with team members and ask them the question: “What is it like to be led by me?” This will give you an immediate indication as to the sense of authenticity and trust in your team.

The Courage to Calibrate

Real leadership requires the courage to see yourself as others do. It requires inviting feedback, listening with intense curiosity, and giving away the accolades of success to the team who earned them. As the leader, you’ll receive more credit than you deserve, so be generous with the spotlight.

Often, we are too close to our own behaviors to see them objectively. We have blind spots that only an outside perspective can help us illuminate. Sometimes the right first step toward realigning your impact is walking alongside a professional who can help you calibrate your skills.

Whether you’re a new manager or a seasoned executive, the willingness to constantly refine your approach is what separates good leaders from transformational ones.

If you’re ready to stop guessing and start leading with impact, it might be time to find a leadership coach in Oklahoma City. We would love to help you grow! Message us today or set up a time to talk through our website.

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How to Find and Fix Your Leadership Blind Spots